Elaine Snow Porter
I welcome you all here to this celebration of Lainie, being together, sharing and supporting each other at this time.
A time to share her joy, her love, her courage, her passions, her curiosity, and her time here with us.
As we still have âA TeddyBear's Picnicâ fresh in our minds, off we go.
I appreciate the reminder of the importance of teddy bears, and of picnics for that matter, for these certainly are things that Mom enjoyed.
And "What if you went down in the woods today?" "What if?"
As we all know, she had her lines, her lyrics, to more songs than we can name off here this afternoon, but that line is a line that she taught us, each of us, about looking for the possibilities, in the woods today, what are they? What might they be?
As we gather here today, to celebrate Lainie, we all bring the many colors, the many facets, the many lessons and connections that Lainie shared with us. I would venture a guess many of those aspects that we bring to this room today could probably connect back to, "if you go down in the woods today?" To the possibilities, to those teddy bears, and those picnic shenanigans.
âIf you go down in the woods today?â guides us, as a mother and a child, as a friend and colleague, as a shipmate, as a librarian and lover of books, as a quilter, as the member of a dance set, as that additional voice in a song, it's a question that so fits her many experiences with all of us.
For to simply contemplate the question requires curiosity. And momâs curiosity, her inquisitive nature was instilled in me at a young age. Her curiosity, of course, did her well as a teacher, but from my vantage point I believe it was there long before she got into teaching, and it remained with her her whole life. For me, this curiosity was most evident on those days when we did, "go down in the woods." Maybe with our teddy bears. Maybe a picnic? The observations, the questions, the always wondering, what might be around the next turn? What might be living in that rotting stump? What might it be that the chickadee is trying to tell us? What might that raven call mean to other ravens? I think her love of a swamp was really her curiosity tapping into the unknown aspects of that mysterious landscape. Her wonderment at a tiny, alpine flower, growing high on a peak we've hiked to. Or finding a fossil on a beach, or a beautiful mushroom alongside a trail. And it is this curiosity of hers that certainly inspired many of us along the way.
Lainie's curiosity was just one of the many beautiful things she shared with us.
âIf you go down in the woods today. You better not go alone. It is lovely down in the woods today, but safer to stay at home.â
Here I am reminded that it takes courage to go down in the woods some days. That it is much safer to stay at home. As you all know, Mom was clearly not one for staying home.
Lainieâs courage is something that I would not fully understand or appreciate until much later in my life. We lived with her, our mother, and it was just the way the world was. Later in life, with kids of my own, I would begin to see the lessons around courage that she taught us by example. Her courage brought many amazing experiences into her life with all the adventures that she and Dad did together. These of course, started long before my arrival, but for me, thinking back, the idea of coming to Heckman's Island, living in our house, in what was, at that time, a seemingly remote existence, is mind-boggling. To be in that house through the winters with two most angelic toddlers, hiking in and out with food to feed the family, keeping us all healthy and safe, loved and nourished and doing it all with her smile and love for us and the experience itself. Courage.
As time went on, and I finished my grade six year at Centre School I remember being packed into a station wagon with three other children for an outing. This was the Catherine Pross, Lainie Porter Newfoundland trek, Veronica, Robert, and Aaron, being the other passengers. As a 12-year-old, I did not immediately recognize the courage that both these individuals were taking on, it seemed a little sketchy to me at the time, but it wasn't that many years later that I was able to put it in perspective for what it was. These two took their four children, ages maybe nine through 12, in a small faded blue Renault station wagon on a little cross island camping trip. I have memories of the colors and buildings of St. John's as we stayed a few days with a friend of Catherine's, if I recall correctly. From there, we ventured west across the province, finding camping spots along that long stretch of road. I remember tents and sleeping mattresses piled up underneath us as we rode, four across in the back seat. And a morning with snow-covered tents, when my 12 yr old self knew that the trip was off the rails. But of course we made it to the coast, where the beauty of Newfoundlandâs west coast washes away any doubt one may have about the adventure you might be on. And there is the lesson, Without courage that experience would not have been. That adventure has stayed with me to this day.
It takes both curiosity and courage to dream up and embark upon adventures such as this.
One's courage, as anyone who has embarked on almost any maritime endeavor knows, is one that must be packed in ample supply in your duffle bag. Lainie's marine adventures began aboard the schooner Stephen Taber, where she and dad met, and those adventures continued the rest of her life. Adventures aboard the Taber, Surprise, Plum Duff, Ellen, Concertina, Mento, and of course Watermelon, some adventures in the Florida keys, the Bahamas, on canal boats, and oh, the stories she can tell of those adventures.
From my perspective, as a young lad growing up aboard some of these water craft, She, was the best to stand night watch with, as our a lotted time, there in the dark, and the glow of the binnacle, was comfortably filled with her endless repertoire of songs, with her curiosity and questions about the marine mammals making these startling noises out there in the dark, about the sea birds who would gather around the boats at night, about the heavens and all their possibilities, and of course this courage of hers, that she shared and taught by example, got this young lad through them all.
Courage was perhaps a quiet superpower of Lainie's. Certainly another one of those special traits that she shared with us.
As an aside, regarding the endless list of songs that one could cover on a night watch one realizes in this day and age, of streaming music, That I grew up with music streaming every day I was with her. She was an expert at streaming music for herself and for all of us. And what a treat it was.
âIf you go down in the woods today. You better not go alone.â
Lainie certainly did not go alone.
For here we come upon Lainie's "Front Page" superpower. Nothing quiet about this one. She was constantly reaching out to all of us, taking us here, visiting you there, making connections. It is here on our âwalk in the woodsâ, where we come to the kindness and love that we all know, we all experienced, and we all remember so fondly. She made kind, loving connections for herself, but also for all of us as well.
Her ability to connect with students at the junior high school library where she and Mary Meisner held forth for many years trying to get us reluctant readers interested in books.
Her ability to connect with Art college students that would come out for annual picnic bashes from the city to Heckman's Island, where copious amounts of food and her welcoming smile greeted them.
Her ability to connect, around a quilt, upon the dance floor of a Scottish country dance, at the farmers market, at a peace vigil, the list goes on.
And, of course over a cup of tea in her home, sharing her ideas and stories, music and books and projects, and making those connections for her and for us all.
If you were new to the group then it was probable that Lainie was one of the first to introduce herself and welcome you into the fold. She seemed to have a great interest in meeting new folks, connecting with them, and making further connections for them. It was something that I saw growing up and it stuck with me.
The connections she made with all of us over the years were important and meaningful to her, as they were to us, but I have always admired her ability to connect with those that she did not know as she knows us. I hear her at the grocery store, engaged in conversation with someone she has never met before, yet she earnestly reaches out to connect with. The smile on her face, putting a smile on their face. The interaction and connection, though brief, providing joy, a smile and a memory. These days, I find myself getting questioning looks from one of my children on a visit to the grocery store. As if asking, âDad, who was that you were talking to?â My unspoken response, I don't know, I've never met them before but I do know why I do it.
Lainie has shared with us, her curiosity and courage, her loving kindness, and these she has passed on to us all.
And so with these in mind, the teacher in me, and in her, the following task is yours.
When you go down in the woods today, take with you, her curiosity and courage, her love, compassion and kindness. Find joy in those adventures, with those questions and moments, as she taught us how to enjoy.